IMPERFECT


I went to my shrink today

The bus was VERY early-

like an entire hour

but she really is worth it

My love/hate relationship with

the bus continues

A whole hour?

Lucky I was just sitting here

The bus I usually take

has more people-

more of a local

I was not ready

My theory about therapy is simple

If you don’t “click”

with the therapist

very early on;

you are most probably wasting

your time and money

Honesty is ; to me;

the key

IF you don’t trust

your therapist;

get another one

you cannot make progress

if you’re keeping things

bottled up inside

I feel like I can say anything

to her

She does not stand in judgement

of me

I like that there is conversation

She feels free to advise me

and we agree on most things

I’m handicapped

but I was raised to be normal

I was not allowed to wallow

in self pity

my Mom had no tolerance

for stupidity

especially from me

I always felt like

I had to do better

more was expected of me

 

My parents; primarily my Mom
wanted to teach me
things I SHOULD have
not been able to do-
PYSICALLY
One very determined woman
sat with me each day
until I learned;
to hem a dress
and finally, YES;
to make a dress
I would gladly wear
Was I REALLY different
Inn reality- YES-
but still
my Mom
allowed no self pity
and looking back
I feel no anger
Graditude
I can never pay her back
She made me cross that line
would walk ALL my life
She expected me to dp
MORE than I should have been able to do
She would have made a GREAT PT
but that was not her fate
I was the last
after me
she just was too scared
She had done nothing wrong
To have a child as imperfect
as I – had to be a bitter pill
for one as able as her

I was a constant reminder
of things gone wrong
which by that period of time
seemed to be the destiny
of her life
She had lost so much
yet she went on
and did not complain
She couldn’t –
she never felt
anyone listened
Ma – I’m
listening NOW

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