My Dog


 

She is laying on the floor

with my ex

He fell asleep here

last night

He was fixing things

He laid down to take a brake

He was asleep almost instantly

I slept in the living room

I did not have the heart

to wake him

We have a strange

relationship

but it works

At least the fighting

is all but over

It’s not worth it

Fate drove us

together

and in the end;

it tore us apart

We are better off

We produced a beautiful child

together

I will ALWAYS love him –

if just for that

but Love is NOT enough

I found that out

the hard way

 

Back to the Dog

(MORE ON HIM

….another time)

She misses him

He’s  her Master

I was the Caretaker

all these years

14 so far

It’s not over

The fat lady

 has not sung

but I have a sinking

feeling

that one of these days

I’ll hear her

My dog USUALLY stays

with me

in the living room

When my kid

moved out

the poor dog

did not know what to do

you’ve got to understand

She may be a dog

but (at least to me)

I know it sounds

bizarre…but…

she acts more

like a cat

She’s aloothe

Standoffish

I have never

been able to get close

to her- right after I got her

I had a plethora of problems

that coinsided with my taking ill

I had a 4 year old labrodor

who died- He was the sweetest

“gentle giant”: in the world

When we buried him

I thought to myself

NO MORE

I was heart broken

That dog was irreplaceable

So my (then) husband

got our child another dog

a Husky- everyone (but me)

thought she was georgeous

I did not want her

but…I was out-voted

I never worked outside

my home

I got disability

at a very young age

I was Agoraphobic

I was having

panic attacks at work

So the shrink told me

to quit BEFORE

I stroked out

When I got the

“Award letter”;

I felt that I, single handedly

had won a war

“….and to the winner,

go the spoils”….

my Disability check

for life

AGAIN-

BACK TO the DOG

She eats like a cat

The ONLY dog I’ve ever owned

(She owns me) who eats

multible times a day

Everytime she barks;

she gets fed

I did not do that

My ex did

She must get fed

about 10 times per day

I’ve always fed a dog

1-2 times a day

with water until about 7pm

She is dying

I’m sad and when she goes;

I will be more guilty than

anything else

Guilty for not loving her more

Guilty for never getting too close

but after my Lab died-

I did not want another dog

I wanted to grieve

I was too busy dealing with a new dog

to mourn for the dead animal

who I loved dearly

 

I will get up one morning

to find …..

the angel of death

standing over my dog

NO MORE DOGS

….and this time

I mean it

 

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s