Girl On A Swing

I guess I was about 5
looked at the people around me
EVERYONE was on a diet
….except me
I need to gain weight
I had just gotten my little ass
thrown out
of my pediatrician’s office
NEVER to go back

Well; a quarter of a lb
is enough to gain in a year
ism’t it?

Look around
I live in a family where
everyone eats
….exept me

I just saw this
REALLY cool commercial

Girl on a swing
“I’m NEVER going to
be fat….

I eat Jello
Hell, I HATE Jello
I won’t eat anything

These are the facts:
I am “different”

My sister tells me
“something is wrong
with you”

She’s eating Boloney
….and she’s FAT
Normal but fat

G-d knew what he was doing
I will NEVER have a weight problem

I know- I’m handicapped

BIG DEAL- you’re FAT


My favorite cousin told me:

Keep eating ALL that candy
….you’ll be 300lbs!


I’m the “girl on
the swing”

Well, it’s 55 years later
I’m NOT fat

I am, however,

Who wins?

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